To Donate To The Sassy Blonde

Click HERE to be linked to her GoFund Donation page. Thank you for your support.

Friday, August 23, 2013

How You Heal, Has Nothing To Do With How You Physically Feel

What is Healing: Healed?

I just read an article about healing. Is illness a manifestation of all of our negative thoughts and energies? If we meditate more, pray more, will we become "healed?" Buddhist principals say that: life is suffering. Am I sick to remind me I'm alive? Maybe I'm sick to remind others how lucky they are to be alive? Maybe I'm not sick for any single reason, maybe I just am.

I used to joke that me being sick the first time was just further proof that my parents divorce was the best thing possible because their genes clearly don't mesh well together. I think the question becomes, why do I need to know why? Most likely, there isn't a why. I do get frustrated and think, if this is just a luck of the draw scenario, then why me FOUR TIMES? Why couldn't I have won the lottery FOUR times? Luck is not on my side. So, if there is no reason, is it really so wrong to create reasons for myself to make myself feel better?

To Remind People Life Is Short

Your life could be taken at any second. Think Regina George in Mean Girls being hit by a bus, dude that could be you. But seriously, you never know. I used to count down the days to things, concerts/ birthdays/ holidays/ etc, but I think that is the wrong way to approach life. You shouldn't be wasting those days, wishing them away, just to get somewhere in the future quicker, because you're going to look back and wish you could have those days back. I ask myself, what about today was fabulous? What made today a special day? Because realistically, each day is a gift.

My mom got a 250/250 on her end of semester assignment that was worth the majority of her grade for one of her courses, and I helped her with it! She was so excited. Jumping around like a little kid who just brought home their first report card with an A. It was amazing to see her so happy, and feeling so accomplished, and yes knowing I contributed to that happiness.
I also went to the DMV with my sister (haha I know that doesn't sound like it will have a happy ending but hang in there). I didn't want to go, I wanted to lay around and be lazy. I was bored. I had nothing else, to do and was like why not, go spend time with your sister. We had a blast. The DMV guy was flirting with me, and even pulled the
"Are you even old enough to be a bartender line."
It was amazing. I felt giddy like a little school girl and one of the seniors just winked at me. As we were pulling out I said,
"OMG Nat, that was so much fun. DMV's are not like that in Canada."
To which she replied in a mocking voice,
"I had so much fun at the DMV'-said no one ever."
I laughed and legit love how funny my sister is. She compliments me in her weird ways-
"You're so smart but you sound SO dumb when you talk like an ACTUAL blonde."
Uh thanks. She drove by the insane asylum, just because I wanted to see it. We bonded in our weird "we have nothing in common" way but it was time I wouldn't trade for anything. It was a good day. I didn't win a Nobel prize or deliver a baby, or save a cat from a tree, but I had some meaningful moments, that I may not remember in twenty years, but today was not a waste. Today just added blocks to the foundations of the relationships with those two people who are important to me. As cliche as it sounds... live every day as if it were your last.

Appreciate The People In Your Life

Appreciate the people in your life, all of them. Even the ones that have hurt you. I guarantee if you look closely enough at the situation, you learned something from it. Don't hold grudges, what does that get you. A little extra weight on your shoulders? Awkward run ins, tension and just really nothing worth while. My new thing is asking myself
"What do you hope to accomplish by this?"
I ask myself this before everything. Good things, bad things, any decisions. Especially when I'm mad, before I say something, I ask myself this. It prevents me from throwing low blows which inevitably leads nowhere good. It makes me think my decisions through way more thoroughly.

The smallest things, anything that shows that you were being thought about, or were thinking about someone else, are so important. I had someone recently tell me, that they were having a conversation with other people and social media came up. They were talking about who their favorite person was to follow, and I came up as their answer, even before I had gotten sick. This was a huge compliment over something so small. They relayed it to me, and honestly I was glowing, it made me feel so warm and fuzzy inside. Tell people how you feel, because they may not know. Even if its something small. How do you feel when someone you've never met compliments you, pretty damn good. So we need to focus on more positive feedback in life. Lets start telling people what they're doing right more often instead of whats wrong.

Appreciate and Take Care of You

I think this is a really important one. As you get older, your body grows weaker, you grow wiser. When you are sick, things your body used to be able to do, things you used to take for granted get taken from you. I miss my trainer A, every day. I would bitch and moan and complain about going to the gym, but she was giving me the greatest gift of all. A healthier body, and even more so a healthier mind. Yes I was exhausted because I had to work 3 extra days a week to afford it, but it was worth it. I forgot that if I don't take care of my body, I don't have a way to live my life. Your body encases your soul, so no matter how strong your will to live, and your soul may be, with out your body you don't have a life. With that being said, you could have the best body on the planet, but if you are not content with yourself, your body is just an empty case. I finally feel as if my mindset is the best its ever been, and now my body, my home, is failing me.

Now that my body is being taken from me, I wish I had taken better care of it. I never smoked, I didn't tan in tanning beds and most of the time I wear sunscreen. I don't do drugs but I definitely drink. What can I say, I have a weakness for extra dirty Kettle One martinis and Caesars. (Americans: think blood mary but 100x better) I like to think I played by the rules and I'm still suffering. However, I did what I could I guess. Could I have been better, absolutely. I was a pudgy munchkin last year and still have a little extra love pudding to lose. BUT I like me. I know who I am, and I'm not ashamed nor sorry for it. It took me a long time to figure out who that was. It also took me a long time to figure out that not everyone will like that person but as long as I do, that's all that matters. So as much as I'm saying take care of you "as in your body" I'm saying take care of you the person inside. It has to balance out.

People are going to judge you and bring you down. But I've learned two things about that... It doesn't matter if people judge me. I. Like. Me. You can't change what people think, you can just know that as long as you were you, and the best version of you, that their judgements are not worth your energy. This also goes to say though... Who are you to judge anyone?

Realistically, life is to short for me to waste time and energy trying to get them to stop judging me. Just be you.

This is all hard to explain. I mean, I feel like I am preaching but as I laid here today trying to think what I wanted to write about, I kept thinking about who I was and why this was important to me. The things that are most important to me are my relationships with my family and my friends. With people whom I've never met who have reached out to me, because they are inspired or offering support. You think about your legacy, how you want to be remembered. Not because you think that being remembered is the only thing people will have left of you soon, (Sorry, I'm going to win this fight and be here a hell of a lot longer) but because its a legacy that you want to cultivate while you still have time. It puts the "why me" into perspective of why its ok that this happened to me, and how I'll be ok. Not only will I be ok, but I will learn, and grow from this and be better because of it. Its not going to bring me down, and its just going to reinforce who I am. This is my reminder of who I am and why I am that way and really as much as it sucks, why I'm grateful. I could have taken years to figure this out, and I'm sure there is still a lot more for me to learn about myself but for right now, this is good, I'm ok. I don't like it, but I'm ok.

Your bruises will disappear and your illnesses will come and go. They suck, but they're a reminder that you're human. Illness reduces you to the most basic of human physical weakness, and connects us all because it affects us all. It serves as a reminder to:

Live, not because you have too, but because you have been lucky enough to have been given the opportunity too.

*Just one of my battle wounds from surgery*


*Would like to send a shout out to pinterest for all the pins. I went on a bit of a rampage lol*

10 comments:

  1. Digging the mindfulness vibe of this post. You have a great attitude and spirit Court. Keep being you.

    ReplyDelete
  2. This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Lee said the hope is that as Li moves up the rankings, she will earn endorsements from international companies. Her protégé is already, she says, “very, very sale ugg famous in Asia.”In the interim, there is that goal, Li says, of “changing how the sport of badminton is viewed in Nike Air Max 2014 Canada” and to inspire younger players to believe that, if she can do it, other players from here can compete at canada goose the highest level internationally.For that, there remains much work to be done, and not just by Li.“She should be the face Nike Factory of badminton but I’m going to call a spade a spade. The badminton leadership team has not used her enough to Uggs Sneakers promote the sport. It’s all marketing and, in my mind, we haven’t done a good job marketing her,” says Philip Chow, Ugg Outlet president of the local badminton federation and the sport’s chair for Pan Am 2015.“We’re using Pan Am as a marketing vehicle ugg outlet to promote her and as we promote her, we’re promoting the sport. If we do that, I think she can take overstock badminton across the country.”
    Some analysts are even more pessimistic than the company, and don't think colder weather this winter will mbt shoes drive up sales.Sam Poser, an analyst at Sterne Agee, said that "the worst is yet to come." Weaker Uggs sales might ugg australia not just be due to weather, but may indicate that the boots have fallen out of fashion, he said. Poser expects Uggs Mens Deckers to miss its already-lowered guidance for the fourth quarter, and that order cancellations will put "severe pressure" on the company ugg sale next year.Stifel Nicolaus analyst Jim Duffy said that Uggs sales may decline even more.

    ReplyDelete
  4. After the successful launch of Illesteva sunglasses here at eyegoodies last month, we are excited to buy cheap oakleys get in our second shipment, equipped with both new classic styles and fresh colorways, as well as a restock of sold out pieces. We thought we would take a bit of time out to highlight the latest additions.The Illesteva fake oakleys Murdoch has an old-school nostalgic flavor — it is a timeless 1950’s/60’s design perfectly executed. Handmade in Italy, it features thick and chunky acetate, and real riveted 5-barrell hinges for strength and durability. For those familiar with the popular Leonard model, the Murdoch has the same great proportions in a more sqaured off shape. This is a classic piece which works really well on both men and women alike, and is a staple style for any wardrobe ensemble. Available in three colors: “Champagne”, Matte Black, and Tortoise.
    It is the perfect combination oakley sunglasses outlet of fashion and function – providing you two uses with a single frame. Even if you only plan to wear as a sunglass it still undoubtedly a unique and fresh piece.The San Juan is Garrett Leight’s take on the quintessential aviator. The GLCO version adds a twist with the addition of acetate temples, an acetate top-Bar, and vintage glass lenses (which are both polarized cheap oakleys glasses and have a back side Anti-reflective coating, to eliminate glare from both in front and behind).Introduced last year as an optical frame, by popular request Garrett introduces the Wilson sunglass into the lineup. Keeping true to the original British classic design which inspired the frame, the Wilson features authentic acetate Windsor rims, detailed metal filigree,

    ReplyDelete
  5. Perhaps in a nod to his earlier music video, Freedom, which included appearances by Naomi Campbell, Cindy Crawford and Linda Evangelista, George has 2015 michael kors outlet enlisted Kate to accompany him in this latest video, and joked on Twitter that there would be “serious eye candy… I’m not talking about me!”George has said the song is his thank you to 30 years of music-making as it is being released exactly three decades since his first single with Wham! entered the charts.‘I am truly blessed, and michael kors sale “White Light” is my thank you to everybody who has been a part of my success,’ the music star said in a release via his publicist. ‘And I mean everybody, including the press!’ Oh George, you’re welcome.This week we heard that the Repetto shoe store in Paris (the fashion pack's first stop for ballet pumps and cute flats) has michael kors deals seen sales of it's Michael Jackson inspired loafers rise dramatically.
    Lyndell and her team were trying to capture movement in the hair and as you can tell they did a marvellous job.To get the look follow these steps:Massage a mix of surf spray and thickening spray into your hair to get that wispy texture.Taking a little texture and a little at a time scrunch through the ends as if it was mousse.Leave out a 1 inch perimeter of hair all around the head - a sort of halo, if you like.Gather up the hair left in the middle and 'pull, push, twist and screw it up into a messy handful of hair' explained Lyndell. Take a couple michael kors black friday of large French pins to secure the hair.With the halo of hair take some spray de mode and a hairdryer and gently blast at your hair with both to get that windswept look, then by eye pin down the 'bulk' of the hair left leaving the flyaways.My tip: think more breezy seaside than gale force winds when creating this michael kors outlet online sale look for everyday wear.When ELLE received an invitation to 'Access All Kors' we were, understandably, intrigued. Not least by what it actually meant…
    Michael Kors described his collection as that feeling of ‘catching the wind in your skirt’. He said he’d been thinking of: ‘How summer vacation makes us feel like kids, and not wanting to lose that feeling michael kors black friday deals 2015 even though we’re back to school.' Kors is the most formidable lifestyle expert, infusing optimism and casual elegance in all that he does. And his spring/summer collection was no exception – as light, effortless and undemanding as a summer breeze. Even if he did quip backstage that at that very moment he felt ‘like a crumpled piece of Kleenex’, michael kors black friday deals this collection was anything but. From the opening pristine white sweater and calf-length dance skirt on Maggie Rizer, he proceeded to tick off his customers’ wardrobe needs with exceptionally real clothes: indigo denim in easy jackets and shorts or drainpipe trousers with big neat turn-ups, a grey sweater with a ruffle over one shoulder, crisp little throw-on blazers, a http://www.michaelkorspremiumoutlets.com daffodil suede shift, a grass-green gingham sun dress, a flirty ivory lace party dress.

    ReplyDelete
  6. The memory of her shabby secretarial skills still makes her laugh out loud: “Gerry gave me the first memo to type. It took michael kors uk me, like, half the day, and she came to me and said, ‘I thought you said you typed really fast,’ and I said, [she switches to a tiny, sheepish voice] ‘Well, compared to my friends [I do].’?”What Sweeney lacked in IBM Selectric skills, she made up for in her ability to critically assess TV movies and specials that might end up on the network. Not much later, Laybourne, a former schoolteacher herself, taught her the art of negotiation the low-tech way. Sweeney would sit at her boss’s side as Laybourne haggled into the telephone receiver. “We didn’t have michael kors outlet online a speakerphone,” says Sweeney. “So I would listen to what she was saying to someone we were buying a series from, and then she’d get off the phone and say, ‘OK, remember when I said that? Well, then he said this.’ And I learned to negotiate by listening to half the conversation and having the other half filled in.”
    The mini-show followed lunch for 20 or so top clients at Holt’s Cafe yesterday following a fête at his Bloor Street store on Wednesday night, with hostess Hilary Weston presiding over the affair in an aqua Oscar de la michael kors Premium Outlets Renta tunic and pants.Elsewhere there was much Michael Kors Spring 2013 about, including a dermatologist in a colourblock dress, and a capital markets trader a peony pink sheath. After tucking into sweet pea ravioli, lobster over fried green tomatoes and a sliver of cheesecake, there was an exodus downstairs to the racks of fall clothes available for special order.
    There are some who think a woman will never climb that high in this field, that the entertainment industry’s glass ceiling is too hard for even the sharpest tiara to pierce. But as with the notion of balance, Sweeney michael kors tote isn’t buying it.“I’ve never signed up for the glass ceiling idea,” she says. “I always felt it was placing a limitation on myself and on every other woman. I believe I’m going to succeed and fail based on what I do, based on my intellect, based on the decisions that I make, based on the people that I choose to work with . . .We can all figure out reasons why we didn’t succeed. Or we can just blow past everything.”
    The movie’s focus on female friendship drew Allen to the role, as did its portrait of midlife 2015 michael kors outlet women who have fun going after — and getting — exactly what they want. "The story starts out with Jessica’s character’s husband having just died; he was older, she was a second marriage for him, and the movie shows that you don’t have to be 20 to have an incredible relationship," she says. "There’s a lot of variety and possibilities out there."Allen is concentrating more on spending time with friends and her 14-year-old daughter, Sadie, than on romance at the moment (she and Sadie’s father, Peter Friedman, split in 2002). "I’m not really dating, but I’m open to michael kors outlet it," she says. "I was never a big dater, ever, and sometimes I feel the same as I did in high school!" She smiles and rolls her eyes when contemplating what’s in store for Sadie’s teenage years.

    ReplyDelete
  7. MICHAEL KORS delivered sportswear for the social club set in New York yesterday. This is the world populated by preppy Ali MacGraw look-alikes, who can wear the sexiest styles and still get away with the most innocent "Who, me?" Even the most buttery of suede babydoll dresses wouldn't melt: given innocent yoke necks and teamed with white driving gloves, Kors' bottom-grazing minis were not in the michael kors outlet online sale least suggestive. In fact, the whole collection had a sporty feel, stretch wool maillots, mirrored glasses, super-tight zip-front jackets, short-shorts and all. Gisele and Carmen Kass led out his cast of supermodels like anti-fuss cops, keeping it clean in navy and 2015 michael kors outlet white, drawing a line under any untidy hems with neat piping and detail-free plackets. His colours were strictly neutral. No tasteless tangerine or lime here. Just pewter, navy, white, mint, and mustard shades. His fabrics were equally exclusive: silk jersey, suede, cashmere and cotton. And the styles: crisp mini shirt-dresses, pencil skirts with belted shelltops, neat boatneck sweaters and button-through wrap skirts (white buttons and piping on navy wool), cardigans worn on the shoulders, and cigarette pants. When it comes to having access to this particular club, if michael kors outlet Michael Kors' name is not down, you're not coming in.
    "I love the clothes, everyone is good-looking, the plot line is a riot," he tells WWD. "I love the show. They called and said, 'You are very Gossip Girl.' I thought, 'Finally, I am a teenager.'"Kors spent Tuesday filming his segment at a mock fashion show staged at michael kors outlet stores NY's Capitale on the Bowery.HAVING partnered with new licencee Swimwear Anywhere Inc after Warnaco Group Inc dropped the business last year, Michael Kors is hoping his new swimwear offering will hit the spot."Swim is such an integral part of my design philosophy," the designer says. "It's not about swimwear per se; it's part of my customer's lifestyle."
    I'm obsessed. michael kors I like streamlined but glamorous at the same time. I like simplicity but I hate minimalism. I think with minimalism, the next thing you know it has no personality. I'm always appreciative of the things we use every day being great to look at. Why isn't your phone great to look at? I think when we have things - michael kors whether it's a lipstick, or a bronzing powder, or a nail polish - why do you feel like you have to hide it? I say skip the bric-a-brac and display fabulous products.
    Krakoff reeled off up more fashion definitions in his collection: ''lace, perforation, macramé, bead embroidery'.

    ReplyDelete
  8. Following a look at the “Black” version, the Blue Devils have revealed their latest Duke KD 9 in White.Featuring a LeBron Soldier 10 White, Royal Blue and White color scheme. This Nike KD 9 features an all-White upper with Royal detailing and Black contrasting accents on the Nike and KD logos. The shoe is KD 7 completed with Duke logos displayed on the heel pull tabs and speckled midsoles.Take a look at the latest Duke’s Nike KD 9 Player Exclusive in White below and let us know KD 8 what you guys think in the comments section.Stay tuned to Sneaker Bar for more upcoming school-inspired colorways of the Nike KD 9 to surface in the coming weeks.
    Kevin Durant‘s offseason LeBron soldier 9 signing with the Golden State Warriors reads like Drake’s opening on Big Rings from What A Time To LeBron 12 Be Alive. And while the Dubs are the undoubted favorites to take home some very big rings by next season’s end, the team still has to get acclimated through 82 regular season games. What better way to do it than by releasing a number of new team-centric colorways of Durant’s team shoe, the LeBron 14 Nike KD Trey 5 IV?The KD Trey 5 IV is everything KD’s signature model is not. Instead of a full-length Zoom Air cushioning system, the forefoot gets the responsive boost while Curry 3 a general phylon midsole offers a lightweight alternative. There’s no Flyknit here either. Instead, a mesh upper complete with optimal ventilation adds a breathable mid-top construction. Standard team-issued colorways of Game LeBron 10 Royal, University Red, White, and Black are all available today starting at $115 USD. Check out a better preview below and head over to Nike.com to grab your pair today.
    It Kobe 9 looks like the soccer-inspired “Mambacurial” colorway concept is coming back once again to the Kobe Bryant’s Nike line.

    ReplyDelete